The Cat-astrophic School Project
by Eikichi
Summary: Jam is assigned a killer school project for falling asleep in class, but it doesn't turn out so well when they try it out!


The Cat-astrophic School Project  
By: Raichu  
Rated: PG for comic humor  
Note: This story takes place in Snowboard Kids 1, not Snowboard Kids 2.   
That's why Wendy and Damien aren't in it. Upon Angewomon2000's request,  
I included her characters Jeanette and Brittany in this story. :)  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
It was in the middle of science class, which was the class before   
the school day ended. The 5th grade school teacher, Miss Lorenzen, was   
telling the class about Marie Curie's discovery of radium when the class began to  
hear snoring noises. All of the students and Miss Lorenzen looked toward  
the middle of the room and started laughing out loud.  
Jam was fast asleep, with his head buried in his folded arms on his  
desk. He was snoring up a storm and would talk in his sleep every now and   
then, saying things that seemed to come out of nowhere, including little  
sentence fragments with Linda's name in it.  
Miss Lorenzen got out a long meter stick from the corner of the   
classroom and held it up in the air above Jam's head and......WHACK!!!!  
"YEEEEEEEEEEOUCH!" Jam cried out loudly, clutching his head with  
his hands. "What was that for?!?"  
"You fell asleep in class again and you were talking about Linda in  
your sleep!" Slash laughed.  
"I think someone has been staying up too late." The teacher replied  
after Slash's sudden comment. "So in that case, with this being the third  
narcolepsy attack this week, I think this requires a visit to the principal's  
office."  
"No! I don't wanna go to the office! It's not my fault if I'm tired  
all the time! Really! Just don't send me to the office!" Jam begged.  
"Well...." Miss Lorenzen thought.  
"Pleeeeease?" Jam begged again.  
"All right. You're off the hook for now. But if it happens again,   
you're going to the office if you like it or not!"  
The bell rang, signaling the end of the school day. All the kids   
in the classroom sprang up out of their seats, gathered up their stuff and   
charged out the classroom door.   
As the five Snowboard Kids walked out the main door to the school with  
their winter gear on and their backpacks, Jeanette and Brittany ran up to   
them from behind.   
"Hey guys!" Brittany called as she caught up with them. "Jam, I   
heard that you got in trouble by the teacher again. How did that happen?"  
"I fell asleep in class again." Jam grumbled.  
"You fall asleep in class?" Jeanette asked.  
Jam shot Jeanette a mean look. "Yeah, I fall asleep in class. All  
the time."  
"How did you get punished?" Brittany asked.  
"Miss Lorenzen made me create a school project that demonstrates   
the use of radium, whatever that is." Jam muttered. "And since no one knows  
how to, that means that I won't get any help, I'll fail the project, and I'll  
get sent to the office."  
"I've heard that soup cans have a bit of radium in them." Jeanette   
told Jam matter-of-factly.  
"Yeah, sure." Jam said under his breath.  
"No, really! I'm positive!" Jeanette insisted.  
"Soup cans are made of aluminum, Jeanette." Jam said angrily.   
"And radium!" She insisted.  
"No they're NOT!" Jam yelled back.  
"Hey! Don't yell at my little sister!" Slash scolded Jam.  
"I'll yell at her all I want!" Jam answered back.  
Jam and Slash began a fist fight that sent the rest of the kids   
flying backward. There were a lot of 'bang' and 'pow' and 'smack' sounds  
among the cloud of snow thrown up by the fight, and it was all causing   
everyone around them to stare.  
Finally, there was a loud 'WHACK' noise as one of Slash's fists caught  
Jam's jaw. Jam was thrown back into the snow and lay still for a moment.  
He sat up and noticed that his mouth was bleeding, and he burst into tears.  
"WWWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!" He cried.  
Slash saw what he had done and ran up to Jam.  
"Jam, I'm so sorry....I didn't mean to..." He took a tissue out of   
his pocket and wiped off Jam's mouth, then gave Jam a hug and let him cry   
into his black jacket.  
"Eeewww! Boy on boy love!" Jeanette laughed.  
"Be quiet, Jeanette." Slash told her.   
When Jam had recovered, he had a big bruise on his cheek and he was  
still sniffling a little.  
"Are you okay?" Slash asked him.  
Jam nodded.  
"I'm sorry. Let's get home and get working on your project." Slash  
said to Jam, helping him up.  
The Kids made their way home, to the huge mansion on top of the snowy  
mountain that they all lived in. Once inside, they took their winter clothes  
off and started to help Jam with his project for school. They had managed  
to build a makeshift ray gun thingy out of aluminum foil, a couple clothes-  
pins, a few electric wires hooked up to the ray gun and the wall,  
a few 'Duracell' batteries and.....  
"A soup can!" Jeanette announced.   
"Oh no. Not this again. Jeanette, how many times do I have to tell  
you, there is NO radium in a soup can!!!" Jam yelled.  
Jeanette ignored him and opened up the side compartment of the ray   
gun and put the can inside. She taped a few electric wires to the can, and  
to the Kids' amazement, it began to glow. She shut the side compartment and  
stood back. The ray gun began to hum and the pointed end of it began to glow  
a bright glow-in-the-dark green.  
Jam was stunned.  
"I told you!" Jeanette laughed at Jam.   
"Whatever." Jam muttered.  
Jeanette teased him in a singsong voice. "You were wrong, I was  
right, nyah-na-nyah-na-nyah-nyahhhh."  
"Shut up!" Jam screamed at her.  
"Do you want me to make that bruise bigger for yelling at her AGAIN?"  
Slash threatened Jam.  
"Sorry." Jam grumbled, still feeling the pain from that hit in the jaw.  
"Okay, now we have to point the ray gun at something, hit the 'on'   
switch and see what it does!" Slash told the others. He aimed it a a pillow  
on the sofa and pressed the switch, and he stood back. Unfortunately, the   
ray gun tipped up a little as soon as Slash stood back, and it shot a   
green laser that missed the pillow and ricocheted off the wall. It bounced  
back and crashed through a vase, where the million broken glass pieces   
turned the laser into five separate little lasers when it shot through the  
glass pieces. The mini-lasers bounced around the room in all seperate   
directions, and the kids ran for cover.   
Despite their hiding places, one of the lasers hit Tommy, then another  
hit Nancy, another hit Linda, another hit Jam, and the last one hit Slash.  
When the free-for-all was over, the only two survivors were Jeanette  
and Brittany, who had hidden in a closet. They slowly stepped out and   
surveyed the damage. Surprisingly, there was no damage, but there was one  
major thing missing. Where were the five Snowboard Kids?  
They looked all over for them. Finally, Jeanette discovered   
something hiding behind the couch. She bent over to look at it, and was  
amazed. It was a tiny kitten with black fur that was spiky above his eyes,  
with a white-tipped tail and white paws. Jeanette gasped when she realized  
what had happened.  
"AAAHHHH! The ray gun turned Slash into a kitten!" She cried.  
Brittany also ran into the living room.  
"Look!" Jeanette told her. "The laser turned Slash into a kitty cat!"  
Brittany held out her hands. Inside was a chubby tabby kitten with  
grey fur/black stripes.  
"I found this kitten in the kitchen. I think it's Tommy!" She cried.  
"Let's find the rest of them!" Jeanette said.  
They set down Slash and Tommy on one of the couch pillows and ran   
off to look for the rest of the kitten-kids. As they headed upstairs,  
Slash and Tommy began to talk to each other.   
"I wonder where the others are?" Slash asked.  
"-Meow-......don't know." Tommy replied.   
"-Meowww-...Should we look for them?" Slash inquired.  
"Sure....-meow-..." Tommy said slowly. Both kittens jumped off the  
couch and padded around the house on their newly acquired kitten feet.   
Slash looked around the dining room and Tommy explored the kitchen. Along  
the way, Tommy heard meowing in the pantry. He pushed the large door open  
with his nose only to find a small Siamese kitten curled up underneath the   
broom and dustpan. Tommy approached the kitten and sniffed it's fur, then  
the kitten hissed "Cut it out, Tom! It's me! Stop sniffing my fur!"  
Tommy recognized the saucy voice right away.  
"Jam? Is that you?" Tommy meowed.  
"Yeah it's me. Can you get me out from under this dustpan? It's   
showering my whiskers with dust and making me sneeze."  
Tommy bit the scruff of Jam's neck and dragged him out from under  
the dustpan and out of the pantry. Jam "dusted" himself off by licking his  
paw and washing his face.  
"Okay. Let's go find the others." Jam said, and bounded off on all  
fours toward the staircase. Tommy and Slash followed close behind and Jam  
noticed.  
"Hey Slash! You look good as a cat." Jam told him.  
"Thanks. You look good too....very sleek." Slash complimented.  
"I'm flattered." Jam blushed by his whiskers.  
"When you guys talk to each other like that it makes me believe what  
Jeanette was saying about you two in boy-on-boy love. Come on, we have to  
find Nancy and Linda!" Tommy told the two.  
The three boy kittens bounded all over the house, mewing and meowing  
and sniffing in all different places to find the last two kids. After a   
long search, the three met back in the living room on the couch.  
"No luck." Jam sighed.  
"Me neither." Tommy said.  
"Not a trace of either of them." Slash said with a meow.  
They were silent for a while.  
As they sat there, they saw a kitten with yellow fur and light-  
orange stripes on her back and tail come pouncing down the stairs.  
"Hi guys!" She greeted them.  
"Nancy!" Jam called out to her. "Where were you? We looked all over  
for you and Linda!"  
"Well, I got tangled up in this very big ball of string in the   
knitting set in the closet, and Brittany discovered me. She untangled me and  
told me to join you guys down here." She explained.  
"Where's Linda?" Slash asked.  
"Jeanette is looking for her." Nancy mewed.  
Slash sauntered over to Nancy. "I'm glad you're okay."  
"Thanks." Nancy said.   
Tommy covered his eyes with his paw. "If you guys are going to start  
romancing, I'll be sitting here under this pillow 'cause I don't want to   
witness it." He slipped under a big fluffy pillow and began to nap.  
"Who said we were romancing?" Nancy asked him.  
At that moment Jeanette and Brittany ran downstairs, with Brittany   
carrying a pretty little Abyssinian kitten with shiny auburn fur. They set  
the kitten down amongst the other four kitten-kids and they walked off to   
shut off the ray gun.  
The auburn-furred kitten stared at the other four kittens.   
"Guys?" She asked.  
"Linda?" Nancy replied. "Oh Linda! We thought you were lost!"  
"No, I'm just fine. How about you guys?"  
"I was stuck under a dustpan." Jam laughed.  
"Well, I can believe that. You are a little clumsy." Linda laughed.  
"Hey, I resent that." Jam said, furrowing his kittenish brow.  
"I'm just kidding." Linda replied, and licked Jam's furry cheek.  
Jam purred loudly in response.  
"I thought I said no romancing!!!" Tommy angrily meowed.  
  
In the meantime, Jeanette and Brittany were trying to figure out and  
rewire the ray gun to turn the Snowboard Kittens back into Snowboard Kids.  
They weren't having much luck until Jeanette figured out a way to reverse  
the polarity of the Duracell batteries, and got the wires reattatched.  
(She was very good at that stuff, prabably because of her avid studying.)  
Brittany got the kittens positioned in front of the ray gun's   
shooting end and hit the switch. The ray gun glowed again, and while it  
got ready, the kittens sat and waited. Tommy curled up to rest, Nancy looked  
up at the ceiling and Jam washed his face. That's when it happened. The ray  
gun shot a second green laser at the group of kittens, and it hit them   
straight on. Jeanette and Brittany watched in awe as the kittens slowly grew  
in size and began to slowly transform into their former long-nosed human   
selves.  
When the ray gun stopped, there sat the five kids....except they   
didn't know that they had just been transformed back. Tommy was curled   
up on the floor on his side, Nancy was scratching at her ear with her foot  
and Jam was licking the back of his hand and rubbing it on his forehead and   
hairline.  
"Hey guys! You're human again!" Brittany called out to them.  
They stopped what they were doing and faced Brittany.  
"Oh.....heh heh......woops." Jam said as he stopped licking.  
  
  
* * *  
  
  
The next day during science class, Miss Lorenzen asked Jam to   
present the project that he had to complete due to his falling asleep in   
class. He proudly walked up, carrying a large object covered in a sheet.  
"5th grade science class, I present to you...."  
He flung off the sheet.  
"A soup-can powered ray gun!" He announced.  
The entire class burst out in loud laughter.  
"I'm serious! It really works!" He yelled, and to prove his point,  
he pressed the 'on' switch. The ray gun turned the opposite way on its   
tripod and fired a laser at Miss Lorenzen. It hit her dead on and she was  
immediately turned into an orange and white cat.  
The class was dead silent for a moment, then they burst out in   
laughter again - but for a different reason. The sight of their teacher as  
a puny little housecat was as hilarious as the idea of a ray gun powered by  
a soup can. Jam hit the switch again and Miss Lorenzen was turned back into  
a human.  
"I have discovered that there is a small amount of radium in soup   
cans that could be enough to fuel something as powerful as a shape-shifting  
ray gun." He told the teacher and the class. "So you could say that, while  
Marie Curie may have DISCOVERED radium, Jam Kuehnemund actually made a   
use for it."  
The whole class applauded loudly, even the teacher, who was still a   
bit shell-shocked from being turned into a cat and back again. Jam got an   
award for Best Science Project of the Year and he won the annual science fair.  
He also won a lot more popularity, something he actually didn't have too much  
of since he had a grand reputation as a sassy rapper boy. And he won   
something else - the privelege of having himself and his friends turned into  
housecats to see what feline life is like - he won a school award for that,  
too.   
And who would have guessed it, shortly after this whole ordeal   
happened, Jam asked Linda if she wanted to go see a movie that night, and   
sure enough, Linda agreed....what better than to be the date of the boy who  
created Snow Town's first ray gun and won five awards for what he accomplished?  
(As well as getting himself and his friends turned into cats.) :)  
  
Jeanette: "Hey! Wait a minute! I was the one who told him that radium is  
in soup cans!!! I should get credit for this too!"  
  
Brittany: "Yeah, oh well. Bye-bye, all you authors at FanFiction!"  
  
Jeanette: "Yeah, bye everyone!"  
  
-The End-  
  
  



End file.
